Valentine Kempynck and her waders

Every now and then we come across something that completely matches Wikkelgoed's vision and even adds something to it. For us, these are Valentine Kempynck's shrouds. With De Omhelzing and Rondomrond, the Flemish visual artist offers an intimate mourning ritual, in which death is once again allowed into daily life.

From costume designer to wader maker

Valentine is much more than a wader maker. She studied Word at the Ghent Conservatory, worked for more than 25 years as a costume designer for Toneelgroep Amsterdam and Guy Cassiers, among others, and founded the design collective BELGAT in 1990. From her great love of art, she has been making installations for years, and she researches the theme of rituals around darkness. She also works a lot with families around dying and saying goodbye, and she gives shape to farewell ceremonies together, preferably in nature.

Her motivation to make shrouds stems from a personal search for ways to give the dark its place. “Everyone dies and yet we often hide death away. A shroud is a natural way to say goodbye to someone, without hiding. You cover your loved one for the last time; that simplicity gives recognition and self-evidence. The deceased feels very close. This creates space for intimacy and security. It reduces the distance between then and now, between here and there. By taking the time and space for the ritual of closing the shroud, a valuable moment of shared reflection is created.”

Photo: Valentine Kempynck during our folding training at Dichtbij Afscheid

The Embrace: A Connected Ritual

The Embrace is a shroud made of wool from Limburg sheep. Valentine makes this shroud by hand and embroiders different arms on the different fabric parts. Each arm symbolizes someone who was important in the life of the loved one. There is a standard model for when the shroud is needed quickly, but Valentine can also personalize the shroud. This means that she chooses in consultation with the relatives which arms she embroiders on the shroud. She has a 'collection' of arms in her studios that differ in gender, age, hand shape and possible sleeve. This creates a unique shroud in which every family member or good friend feels represented.

Photo: Wannes Cre

Closing the shroud can be done by everyone at the same time, spread out over the day or even over several days. Because each arm is a separate strip, everyone can close their own part of the embrace. The process of saying goodbye is much calmer and more natural than when a coffin is closed immediately. It is also possible to leave the shroud open at the face.

The beauty of The Embrace is that both the living and the deceased are involved. The hands that support the head of the deceased are in principle intended for a life partner, even if they have already passed away. The dead (and possibly the unborn) are given their place. This makes the ritual much more personal and intimate than, for example, lighting a candle at a photo. The family is, as it were, reunited and the distinction between life and death becomes blurred. It is about a feeling of connection with each other and this is sometimes reminiscent of a family constellation. The shroud invites relatives to think about their place within the whole, who they want to involve in the farewell, and how the family ties will be reordered after death. The Embrace offers an entrance to deal with these complex issues.

Unique to the Embrace is that there is also a miniature version. This can be a valuable memento. But it can also serve as preparation for the funeral. Survivors can practice the closing ritual (who stands where, which arm is folded first) and children or people with dementia can be included in the farewell process in a light and accessible way. “The shroud is a transition, a way to accompany the physical body in rest. But it is also an object of mourning and memory, which holds something of life itself,” says Valentine.

All around: simplicity and class

Rondomrond is another shroud that Valentine has developed and she calls it 'the little sister of the Embrace'. This shroud was created from the urge for simplicity and class. It is therefore a more modest design. The primary importance remained that the deceased can be covered step by step, together or alone. This shroud is, as it were, a kind of 'zen version' of the Embrace. The people who choose Rondomrond like solidity and sometimes embroider it themselves or ask Valentine to sew a name or a sentence on it.

The fabric is made of 100% organic wool from our own country and has a high density, which means that it has a high density and mass. There are then more wool fibers on top of each other per cubic centimeter. As a result, the body is less visible in Rondomrond, and yet this woolen wade remains wonderfully cuddly and soft.

Personal quest for mourning rituals

Creating meaningful rituals around mourning has a personal origin for Valentine. She lost a child as a young woman and went looking for ways to deal with that grief. Since then, it has been an important driving force behind her work.

In her work Moedervlek, she gives the loss of a child a physical place by tattooing a dot. This ritual is performed in silence under a giant tree in Valentine's garden on a former castle estate. Another special work is the 'Bench'. With this she reopens a Flemish tradition. At the request of a resident, she builds a small bench on the ridge of the roof with a number of bricks from the house. This gives deceased family members and friends a place to rest or just to be close. And this can offer comfort to relatives and the dying.

Valentine's mourning rituals take place in the 'sacred space of the act'. "A shared act creates a space in time in which the grief can be laid down. The acts are often taken from everyday activities. With the shroud, the act of tucking is self-evident, after all, we do this with babies, and that offers comfort; you already know this act, which creates a safe place. By 'doing' this, mourning is interwoven with daily life, which can create space for the unspeakable, where no words are needed." In her work, she strives to give the dark sides of life a place again. "In this time when we all want to stand in the light, darkness can ground us."

Collaboration with Wikkelgoed

We are delighted to add the beautiful Valentine waders to the Wikkelgoed collection. Our collection consists of powerful, aesthetic and simple designs, made of natural materials, that invite a soft and open approach to death. De Omhelzing and Rondomrond fit in very well with this. And they also add something: Valentine's waders can actually be called works of art, which make an even more personal farewell ritual possible.

Do you have any questions about De Omhelzing or Rondomrond , or anything else? Feel free to contact us. Or visit the Valentine's website for more information.